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MARTHA SEZ: ‘There has always been something shady about the gypsy’

October 5, 2018
By MARTHA ALLEN , Lake Placid News

What do gypsy fortune tellers, ghosts, Bigfoot, aliens and demons have in common?

Not much, except that they are all part of our popular culture, our 20th century pagan mythology. It is my theory that everybody believes in ghosts, at least after dark.

This is true of people from all walks of life, all around the world.

A cactus plant by your door will ruin friendships. Expose your crystals to sunlight to remove negative energy from previous, possibly malicious, owners. Frank left in a huff? Fan sage smoke around the house.

A fatalistic attitude toward life has become part of our universal belief system. It's as if everyone I know just woke up one morning and started saying "Oh well, it wasn't meant to be." I suppose people find comfort in mindlessly repeating this axiom, but I don't buy it.

How do you figure? I want to ask, although I know, really, that it isn't a matter of figuring. It's a matter of belief, which is something else entirely.

These same people keep pointing out that everything happens for a reason. Am I the only person left in the USA who doesn't believe this? What is the reason? I want to ask.

I don't think anybody else knows either. I guess the whole point is, we're not supposed to know. It's beyond our ken. All we can do is shake our heads in wonderment and amble on our way.

If we believe that everything happens for a reason and that everything that happens is meant to be, why even bother to get up off the couch? The way I see it, we could all just lie back and watch our stories unfold, like "Days of our Lives," or "Jersey Shore" or "The Beverly Hillbillies" or possibly "Breaking Bad," depending. If it's all preordained and scripted, it seems a shame that we have to go through the motions, like a bunch of dupes. Don't keep me in suspense! Just tell me how it comes out.

This is where the gypsy psychic comes in. I just love the whole concept of the gypsy woman. Veiled in mystery, she drops dark hints about What Is Meant To Be, top-secret information to which she is somehow privy. She must have some kind of dispensation to sell it, or maybe she is bootlegging. There has always been something shady about the gypsy.

When people want their fortunes read, all they care about is love, money, and sometimes the whereabouts of wandering spouses, murder victims and lost objects. Now, we all wish that the gypsy would come clean and say "oh yeah, that's easy, behind the sofa cushions in your Aunt Lydia's living room. That'll be $19.99."

But oh no, she has to make it all murky and mysterious, as if the reception on her psychic screen is bad. Maybe that's part of her cosmic deal with the universe. She can ladle out clues, but she's not allowed to give you the straight dope.

Go ahead, ask her something simple. Like, where is my turquoise earring, the earring that has recently gone missing, leaving its mate to languish alone on the dresser top?

Opposites attract. Like repels like. Nowhere is this more apparent than among earrings and socks. So sad about your favorite earrings. You thought they went so well together. Then suddenly one just disappears, as if it fell off the face of the earth. Maybe it's swinging from the earlobe of some pirate in the South Seas, maybe it's under a grate somewhere. Hey, everything happens for a reason. That'll be $19.99.

Sometimes, I admit, I believe in ghosts, extrasensory perception and my own Tarot card reading powers. Other times I feel like Horatio in "Hamlet." Remember when Horatio didn't believe in the ghost who kept coming up onto the battlements and inciting his son, Hamlet, to insurgency? Even though they did not know about Vulcans in Shakespeare's day-aliens came later-Horatio was undoubtedly the Spock character in the play, refusing to credit something that had no rational explanation. That famous line, remember? "There are some things, Horatio, of which you have no freaking clue." Words to that effect.

Really, it would have been a whole lot better if everybody had just listened to Horatio. Hamlet, naturally, took the ghost's advice-he would-and, as a consequence, everyone ended up dead, which was sad. I especially liked Ophelia.

But hey, everything happens for a reason.

Have a good week.



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